Kristine Joy, Writer

To Whom It May Concern and FWIW,*

• While driving our 2004 Minnie Winnie RV, I needed for the molding outside the driver window to not come undone and be flapping in the wind. I grimaced at the sudden keen awareness of my 5’4” height and wished for momentary Inspector Gadget arms. At a stoplight, the plastic cording came to a rest within arm’s reach so I proceeded to hold the loose ends with my left arm and keep driving…
  • While doing so, I needed for Little Boy Scout (our pug) to remain at my feet, trying to get my attention, instead of doing what he actually did, which was to jump up in my lap. #accidentaverted

• This wasn’t the first time that Scout created RV havoc. When he was a puppy, I pulled up to the fill station upon entering a campground and left the RV running with Scout and two of our other dogs in the camper. I needed for Scout not to jump up on the windowsill, landing one of his little paws on the stem of the lock feature (that had been in an unlocked position before he did so).
  • I needed for the process of getting back into the camper to take less than 3 hours.

• I need for my friend to not lose his job (his position was cut) the week after his wife told him she wanted a divorce.
  • I need for them to have fewer kids than five under the age of 10.

• I need for my other friend, while receiving treatment for cervical cancer, to not receive a call from the husband of her husband’s mistress!
  • And I needed for the immediate aftermath of this phone call to play out better than it did:
    • Wife and cheating husband leave the hospital and drive to a parking lot. He and she proceed to understandably argue. She, three sheets to the wind via cancer fighting drugs, tries to get out of the car, stumbles, hits her elbow on the pavement trying to cushion the fall before cracking her head on the curb. He removes his shirt to use as a tourniquet. They return to the same hospital, less than an hour after they left it, him now in a sleeveless undershirt, her drugged, irate, in need of a cast and stitches and unable to shake the eerie thought that the two of them are the epitome of a Jerry Springer episode.
      • I needed for the strength of her body and their marriage to win out. Both did. Fuc|< cancer; not mistresses.
  • And under the guise of “laugh or cry”, she wrote an unsent alternate Christmas card that I wish I could share with you:

“In January, I received my first treatment for cervical cancer, drove the kids to Timbuktu and back day in and day out for activities and did a lot of dishes. My husband went to Barbados with his mistress (the mistress that I didn’t know existed until April 1st, and I wish had been a fuc|<ing joke).”

• Speaking of fuc|<ing, I overheard this need, “I need for my autocorrect when texting to not change fuc|<ing to ducking when I actually mean fuc|king!”

• I needed for my daughter, when she was 8 years old, to make it known that she too was a wordsmith:
  • Me: That was very observant of you to notice the music playing in the background.
  • Daughter: No, that was very obheardant of me.
    • #minime #shouldbeaword #youHEARDitherefirst

• I need more time in a day and on this planet! Trying to parent, wife, work my job that pays benefits, teach pickleball lessons (my job that doesn’t pay benefits), work my Summer job that pays $11.25 per hour, build a website (and the linked social media accounts), renew a triathlon coaching license (required for my job that pays benefits), obtain 3 new licenses (one of which is necessary to renew the existing coaching license), obtain a new license to continue teaching pickleball in order to keep my sponsorship with Selkirk, be a homemaker, walk the dogs, train as an athlete, train 20+ others as athletes, be a writer (the bones of this website), cook, read, spend time with friends and family, declutter our home, take up golf (a free benefit of the $11.25 per hour job that I may never experience the benefit of), simplify my life (while enhancing my life; is this even possible?), manage our finances, keep my spiritual well-being nourished and fulfill my husband and I’s desire to be away from it all (camp!) is creating a bit of a time crunch.

• I needed for my husband to be willing to seek medical treatment prior to being on the verge of sepsis.
  • I needed to be somewhere other than in a parking lot adjacent to the busiest intersection in town when massaging an antibiotic shot into my husband’s arse as he leans against the truck.
    • I need for my husband and I, based on age difference, to not give off the impression that we are father/daughter on a general daily basis, but especially not when fondling him to the point of assault with hundreds of rubber necking motorists in the vicinity.

I appreciate your readership. I need the validation as writer; if there is a like or heart icon for you to depress, I’d most appreciate the support!

Sincerely,

K.J. Sculling

* The content is presented as “needs”, and some of them may front a harsh reality that evoke strong emotions. Others are expressed in pure jest to entertain myself (and maybe you?!?). Ultimately, the notion that we all live in a more idyllic world is at the core and not actual need. Life can be tough; regardless of your own circumstances, please keep up the fight because life can also be grand! The idea of ‘I Need…’ stemmed from my thought process while sitting at a red light listening to the song, Alright by Darius Rucker, on the radio (you can read the original ‘Idealist’ post here and all ‘Idealist’ posts here). If you’re inspired to submit your own ‘Idealist’ “needs” for future reader write-in posts, I’d love to hear from you via this form.